Wednesday, 10 November 2010

A kind of smug "knowing"

Last night was a good one parenting wise.

I was putting Ben to bed - after a totally nightmarish dinner involving burritos and two toddlers.

If I am home on Tuesday night then it is Holby City night, so there was a definate deadline for Ben's bedtime. Teeth brushed, bedtime nappy on, face washed, pajama's on and book chosen. After reading Counting Farm (and naming every colour, counting every animal etc...) I was considering letting him have another book until he stuck his whole hand in his mouth and smeared it over his face. Nice.

He started doing this weird lick hands and apply to face routine after Ciaran was born, I think he missed out on sucking his thumb and wants to join in with Ciaran in a weird way. It's been my mission to stop him doing it for a long time and straight after I'd cleaned his face wasn't a good time to cover it with saliva. I ticked him off and refused to read a second story as he had been silly and silly boys don't get two stories.

I turned his light off and laid down in bed waiting for my cuddle. He didn't have a toddler tantrum. He didn't cry. He had worked out that I wasn't going to give in and sat bolt upright, arms folded across his chest, staring stonily ahead. I waited a couple of minutes and felt sorry for him. I explained that I was sorry but Mummies and Daddies have to tell little boys off sometimes. I stayed calm and didn't tell him off or match his sulk with one of my own (see I am so mature that now I can avoid a stand off with a three year old!) and I left the door clearly open for him to back down from his sulk.

No response. I laid down, after a few more minutes I asked if wanted to cuddle me - No. Did he want to cuddle his toys - No. A few more minutes and I asked if he wanted me to stay - No.

So I kissed him, told him I loved him, wished him a good nights sleep and left. Some 'mummy sense' told me not to bother opening the stair gate. Thirty seconds after I left the screaming and wailing for Mummy started, quick kiss and cuddle and I was back downstairs, pride intact, son's love restored and best of all -  ten minutes before Holby City started!


  1. I think I have all of this too look forward to...

    My daughter is already as stubborn as a mule and she's only 19 months old. I think it's only a matter of time before she refuses mummy cuddles and has a wobbler at every little thing possible. Hang on a minute... she already does! x

  2. Thats a lovely post. Came over from BMB to say hello.

  3. Its horrid when they say they don't love you anymore. Still - this is just a taster of what we'll all have in 12 years time!